Fauna

Like most children, my brother knew what he wanted to be when he grew up. Unlike most young adults, he is still pursuing that same goal into his early twenties. Herpetology, Zoology, playing with animals, catching lizards with a two-pronged stick, studying bird’s fecal patterns, call it what you will—he is on the path to becoming a certified veterinarian. For as long as I can remember my brother has been torturing small animals, primarily reptiles and amphibians, developing an ever more intimate yet detached relationship with them. I think his philosophy finally crystallized this past summer when he interned at local vet hospital and did things like clean up blood, take temperatures, and subdue large animals. When asked “why animals?” he would respond “because I won’t care if they die (the alternative being a human doctor of course).” Although a perverse and somewhat unsettling outlook to hold, as long as a vet does his or her job it’s hard to complain too much, and who knows, maybe a lack of any emotional attachment to your patients, no matter how fundamental of one, actually proves beneficial in the long run.

In any case, due to his request I am attempting to describe some of the local fauna here in southern India. Please excuse my rudimentary knowledge of scientific terms and any unnecessarily grotesque details—for those are by far his most cherished.

First to mind are the stray dogs. Often resembling small, slightly malnourished greyhounds with multi-colored and patchy coats, dogs roam the streets here in similar numbers to the States during evening dog-walk time, except they have no owners, leashes, collars, or homes here. These are highly complacent dogs, mostly sleeping all day, and often keeping one eye open that seems to say, “why do these people bother to run around all day in the heat.” Then at night, I imagine, they roam for food and potential mates, and while I’m yet to see or hear dog copulation I’ve been told it can reach a pretty high decibel. While we’re on the subject, one of the biggest differences between animals here and those in the States is the massive size and prominence of their testicles, especially on dogs. The other day I saw a Wiener dog (a rare breed sighting) and its balls were nearly dragging on the ground.

I’ve seen monkeys but only on my brief jaunts outside of the main urban area. From my observations they appear to be typical mid-sized monkeys doing typical mid-sized monkey things such as grooming, hanging around in trees, and looking for bananas.

About once a week upon turning the final corner on our walk to work we are greeted by several large cows plopped over in front of the office gate. They seem to have some sort of routine where they appear every 5 days or so and leave large, smelly gifts in front of the office until they tire of the office dog (adopted from the street) barking at them. These appearances may have something to do with the rain patterns but I’m not sure. And if we are including flies in this survey, tack on several hundred of them here. There’s also the bulls, more commonly sighted pulling a large cart down the street while being constantly honked at and whizzed by. There is a sacred aspect to these animals but that might simply come from my thankfulness that they don’t try and attack me as I pass within inches of them.

Now for Zach’s favorite; reptiles and amphibians. How jealous you will be Zach to hear that I share my home with anywhere from a dozen to dozens of small, translucent gecko-lizard creatures. They do fun things like get stuck in the sink basin, poop on the walls, and hide in glasses I am about to drink from. There is currently a clump of hair blowing in circles on the floor that I continue to mistake for a lizard. Outside, depending on the heat and moisture, small critters such as frogs, chameleons and…other lizards…roam the terrain. I saw a snake once in a small pond.

To sum up, there are large mammals, goats, reptiles, bugs, loud yelping birds that escalade their noises until I’m woken up and then slowly dissipate them, dogs and cats, other creatures I am forgetting, and I think I saw a rat once.

There is also a vet hospital down the street, although it the only one I’ve seen and not much larger than a mini-convenience store. Fortunately there are numerous people hospitals throughout the city. I don’t know if you would do so well here Zach, you might be forced into caring.